Being Spiritual!

Firstly I am sorry for being away for way too long. I was just swamped with some other priorities and I am sure some readers must have written me off as just another blogger who starts writing but never really finishes… but here I am with another one!

 Today, I thought of writing about is a little controversial topic and can be easily misunderstood.

                While I was cleaning the loft and I came across a very old photograph of my late grandparents, which sent me down a memory lane and the train of thoughts continued. I was reminded of a daily routine, which was my closest association with my grandfather. I am born in a family which follows Jainism as a religion. When I was about 4-5 years old, each morning, my mom would give me a bath and dress me in a special frock that was meant specially for temple visit. My grand father, dressed in his white cotton dhoti and a stole like garment wound across his shoulder,  used to carry me in his arms and take me to the temple which was just a few minutes walk from our home in Matunga (we used to stay in Mumbai, in those days). I still remember climbing the pristine white marble stairs of the temple, bowing to each stair and touching it with my palms before stepping on it, trying to copy my grandfather’s actions. My grandfather would go in a small room and start rubbing a piece of sandalwood on a roughened stone to make a sandalwood paste, which was then used to worship the marble idols of God. Then he would bask a white handkerchief on the smoke of the incense sticks and wear it himself and make me wear mine across my mouth covering my nose. Then he would lift me and make me stand on a platform, where the idols were placed, hold my hand and teach me to put tilak on the toes and forehead of the idol. Then we would sit in the porch of the temple and he would teach me to make a perfect Swastik with rice grains and then he would start saying prayers (mantras) in different postures as described in the religious books and I would be aimlessly looking at various people coming in and going out of the temple, pujaris doing their worshipping, the flower girl selling flowers and would be eagerly searching my grandmother who could take me home. This was my first introduction to religion. I didn’t know what I was doing, I didn’t know why I was doing it. I was just doing what I was told. There was no faith, no understanding of what is God, why do we worship God, why are there these rules of wearing a certain kind of attire, covering mouth, saying specific words in specific postures etc. I was too ignorant to even ask questions.

 

             Recently, one of my dear friends, while we were casually chatting, asked me “Are you religious?” I replied to her that, “I do believe in the preachings of my religion, the crux of which is “Ahimsa” (non-violence).” And I am talking about any belief (religion) that you may follow, it basically comes down to non-violence. Further explaining I said, “Non-violence doesn’t just mean not to hurt anyone physically. But it means not to hurt anyone by your actions, not to hurt anyone by your words, not to hurt anyone by your thoughts and emotions.” Physical non-violence is easy to follow, but it is the rest that take a lot of determination to live by. Then she asked me, “Do you go to temples? I replied, “I do go to temple, but for a different reason. My first reason for going to a temple is because my parents feel good when I do and they feel that they haven’t failed in instilling some ‘good values’ in their child. Second is because it reminds me of my grandfather. But I’d be lying if I would say those are the only reasons. I go to temples because it gives me immense peace there. Especially the Jain temples, that I often go to, are so designed as to soothe all your senses. When you enter the temple, due to its architecture and construction with marble, it’s always cooler than the rest of the place, which instantly makes your body a little at ease. The cold marble flooring that you sit on makes you shed the superiority with which we strut around all day around. The white idols with a serene smile and lively eyes make your eyes feel calm. The idols are smeared in sandalwood paste and decorated with flowers, the smell of which is again soothing to the senses. There is light of the diyas and the smell of the incense stick which is purely divine and takes you to another state of mind. The tinkling of the bells that can be heard in the background gives your ears a soft nudge amidst the peacefulness. Just sitting there, with your legs and arms folded, leaving the baggage of the worldly worries makes you so relaxed and it unclutters our chaotic minds. The meditation that you do sitting there also makes your brain free of thoughts especially negative ones and makes way for the positive thoughts to enter.  This exchange of vibes starts making you feel lighter and liberated. Each visit to the temple that is haste-free is a liberating experience. My father, who is a very religious man and who wouldn’t even eat before he has visited a temple, each and every day thinks there is science behind each and every ritual and gives wonderful and agreeable reason behind most of them. As I grew, I had questions and I had a quest for the answers for those questions. I was lucky enough to be born in a family where my parents believed in cultivating and satisfying one’s curiosities by answers and explanations. I had questions and all of them were answered. If they didn’t have an answer to them, they would encourage me to ask other, more learned people.  

 

 

 

                A friend of mine who is also spiritual but not religious told me a very nice thing that I would never forget and would like to tell my kids the same. He did not believe in going to the temples so the people of the society, who are so called God-fearing people may have reprimanded his mother to teach him to learn to go to the temple, to which her answer was beautiful- “I will not teach my son to ‘Lie’ in the Temple”

 

 

                All of us have different reasons to worship God. I have seen a lot of people praying for good grades, for happy life, for prosperity, for the fear that if they don’t pray- something bad will happen to them. I have come across people who would fast on certain days to get a good husband, or good grades or to please the Goddess of wealth or for the well-being of their husbands etc. Basically each one of us is trying to bargain with God. Each one of us is trying to give him a good deal and we call that Deal- a prayer. Yes I do go to temple, I do pray, but my prayers consist neither of any mantras or any chants, nor of any bargains but they consist of a small Thank-you to God for each day that he blesses me with. I don’t do it out of fear or want. I do it out of my own free will without asking for anything in return. It’s about being Spiritual that matters more than being Religious...

DISCLAIMER: This post is about my personal experience and has nothing to do with promoting Jainism or demoting any other Belief. I do believe in preachings of all religions which, according to me, boils down to same principle. I respect and bow down to each and every Faith and Belief. This post is not racist.

Endure the Pain, Enjoy the Gain

 

             Although pages and pages have been said about No pain, No gain, I came across a different perspective to it. This is a true incident that happened to me to change my outlook to this very common proverb.

              It is about a patient that I came across recently that lead me to thinking about the importance of good and bad feelings in our lives. There was a young boy around 5-6 years of age whose parents called up saying that their kid had redness of eyes and wanted to visit the hospital. My receptionist being a non-medico asked them if their child is in pain which he wasn’t and consequently instead of seeing them urgently as they should have been, she called them after 2-3 days. When I saw him in the clinic he had a huge corneal ulcer (infection on the cornea which is usually blinding) with blood shot red eyes and difficulty in seeing. He had no other symptom. Still no pain or discomfort. I was quite amazed as the infection of such a magnitude, usually leaves the patient incapacitated. I started treating the basic pathology with which he had come to us i.e; the infection, with a note in capital letters in his case record saying NO PAIN. I had decided to re-visit that problem later, after the main infection had settled down. The infection gradually reduced within a month’s duration leaving a scar on the cornea. Now was the time to refer back to that little note written on the top of his case record (NO PAIN). I decided to do a detailed neurological examination for him. To my surprise I noted that his hands were full of scars and one of his wrists was a little crooked, further examination revealed a malaligned healed fracture. His knees and feet had several scars too. One of his knees had a large bruise which looked quite recent but he wasn’t complaining. The idea of child-abuse came to my mind with so many injuries. Then I did the sensory examination for him and started poking his skin at various parts of his body with a fine needle. He didn’t even wince his eyes leave alone feeling the pain to withdraw himself which is the usual normal response. I was puzzled and worried. I was amazed too. I had never come across something like this before. I asked him to see a neuro-physician and took his contact details to make sure he was fine and also to keep myself updated about this Wonder-Kid. I went home with the puzzle in my mind and the puzzle wouldn’t leave me at peace. After finishing my daily dinner ritual I started scanning the huge dust filled piles of my medical books and journals.

 After going through a lot of articles and books full of diseases, I finally came across this disease called CIPA (Congenital Insensitivity to Pain and Anhidrosis). In simple words it is a disease in which the person doesnot feel any pain since birth. To them the sensation of pain is an unknown feeling as they have never felt it ever in their lives. They don’t know how painful it is to fall on their knees and bruise them, they don’t realise how horrible it feels to sip onto a boiling hot cup of milk and scald their tongue, they don’t feel the discomfort of breaking their bones while playing. They are like Super-Humans. I thought to myself, “Oh Wow! Aren’t they ‘blessed’! Don’t we all want that, absence of pain. Not feeling the Bad sensation at all.” But then I kept reading further into the disease and reached to a stage where the complications resulting from CIPA were enlisted. These people can’t feel the scalding, so they would continue to have hot food anyways and burn their tongue. Since there is no pain the body doesn’t stop and take time to heal but continues the pain causing activity, resulting in the worsening of the situation. Their bone is broken in a limb but since there is no pain, they wouldn’t notice the broken bone and keep working with the broken limb and thus results in malaligned bone structure. So is the case with multiple cuts and bruises. After I finished reading, I made a note to myself to discuss the case with the neuro-physician and also made the list of pre-cautions that he would need for life like having warm or room temperature rather than hot/cold food, always wearing gloves and socks, not going out in extreme cold or hot-environments, after every fall or injury to get x-rays or atleast a complete check-up for broken bones and unnoticed cuts and bruises. To check the eyes each and every day for any redness or swelling on the lids etc.

 

             As I was lying on my bed trying to fall asleep, I started thinking, “So much for not feeling the pain”. We all desire absence of pain from our lives. But its absence can make us so crippled. Pain is actually like a traffic police of our body. It keeps us from taking wrong turns in life, helps us follow the correct ways, maintain a correct speed limit and stop at the signals. And when we break any of these rules it punishes us by the PAIN. It tells us to slow down, take some time out and let the body heal. It teaches us to be cautious of certain things and we  learn to avoid them . In the same way, the feeling of pain to our mind, feeling of hurt keeps us in check morally. There are these painful feelings like Guilt, Remorse, Loss, Sadness, Dissappointment, Suffering which help us become a better person. Guilt keeps our intentions in check. A person with guilt will always think a hundred times before doing the wrong thing. The feeling of remorse is also useful to help a person to repent for his wrong deeds and indeed teaches him to avoid doing such deeds in future life so as to avoid having a similar situation. The feeling of being away from a loved one makes you love the person even more. Loss and Disappointment although make us feel bad and dejected in the beginning but they also give us a sense of Hope and Strength for a better tomorrow. And lastly the feeling of sadness and suffering, which is felt by each and every person in life, helps us to learn to deal with difficult situations in life. To feel sad is important to realise the importance of being Happy in life. It is the presence of sadness which wants to make us work hard towards happiness in our lives. If you have felt this sadness in your life you would realise the importance of happiness in yours as well as others life.

 

Only rare people in life are ‘cursed’ with the disease of CIPA, but a lot of us are emotionally numb and are ‘cursed’ with the Moral Insensitivity to Pain (by pain I mean all the negative feelings), thus lacking to  realise the importance of Good feelings in life. Embrace pain and Realise the importance of Pleasure.