My very first post received a warm welcome from my dearest
friends and the fellow bloggers. At the outset, firstly I would like to thank
my dearest sister Namita (who also writes amazing poetries) for inspiring me
and for coaxing me to give a hand to writing. It is because of your words that
I am writing this.
Today I was driving to work in my car and an auto-rickshaw
came and bumped on the side panel of my car to overtake and sped away before I
could even realize what had happened. I felt bad for a second and then got
absorbed in the music and didn’t give it a second thought. I didn’t even bother
to check the size of damage after I got off the car, but resumed everything
normally as if nothing had happened. I was just recollecting the day’s event
before sleeping and I realized how different my reaction was to the bump today
than it was on the day when my car got its very first scratch. It was just two
days after we had bought it and I was coming from the market when the
auto-rickshaw scratched a bit on the rear end at the signal. I was so mad; I
got off the signal and started yelling and screaming at the driver, the traffic
got jammed for a few minutes because of the commotion and then a traffic police
had to intervene and he made the driver apologize to me before I drove away. I
also made a fuss at home and couldn’t stop telling it to my mom and dad, and my
dad said “Its ok, this is your first scratch so you are over-reacting and you
will be okay after some time” and I was like, “How can you say that, I love my
car and will never tolerate such rash driving with my car.” And he just smiled
and said, “We will see.” The scratch was smaller than it was today; the
reaction was much bigger than it was today. The reaction kept getting diluted
with every passing scratch or dent on it. (Well it’s not that I am a bad driver
but one should try driving in Ahmedabad. There’s no traffic sense especially
the auto-rickshaw drivers). It made me wonder that it’s basic human nature. The
first scratch is always more painful and as the amount of damage or dents and
scratches increase, our reaction starts getting milder.
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The first time lack
of contact with a friend is a worry. You would immediately and eagerly just
pick up the phone, chat, have a conversation and feel good about it, but as
these instances keep repeating, you would think you would do it later, you
would wait for the other person to call, you would get busy with your other
work and the time elapsed between conversations increases and the friendship
may even end eventually due to lack of initiative. Similarly, the first fight
with a loved one is very upsetting. We would try to do everything under the sky
to make him/her feel that we are sorry and that they are special, even when
it’s not your fault. There’ll be flowers, cards, gifts, attention and so much
love and hugs and kisses after a fight in the beginning when the relationship
is ‘new’. But as things get older and the relationship passes more and more
years, your reaction to fights keep getting diluted to the extent that after a
few years neither would even bother to say or feel sorry for the fight and the
life goes on. And depending on the kind of people involved in it, the relation
either becomes a habit or the grudge keeps piling on and the scars eventually
lead the relation to end. The first kiss is so special but then its special
charm fades away until it becomes a routine. Even in a marriage, first month
after the wedding, the husband would come early from work, the wife would
prepare all the favorite meals for the husband just like that without any
reason, the only reason being love, but as time passes this behavior becomes
limited for the special occasions and a few years later neither of them bother
much. Why do we care for our car less because it has been dented more than once?
Why do we not call our friend because they haven’t called us in a while? Why do
we not give the flowers every time that we upset our loved ones? And why don’t
we want our spouses to feel special every day and every time, just like the
first day of marriage?
It’s the human nature I feel that is responsible for such
behavior. We all are like children in that sense. The new toy and the joy of it
remain short-lived, and then everything just starts fading away. I really fail
to understand whether it is good or bad for us. I think it has both sides to
it. It’s bad because the value of a thing, value of a person, value of the
relation keeps fading away. I am sure each one of us misses it once in a
while. But on the good part of it there is much less fuss around and the life
becomes easy going. These relations gradually become like the salt in the food,
even if they are not visible they form the most important part of your life and
the absence of it will make you realize the worth of it. Sure thing these
special gestures add color to our lives and make them pretty just like the
exotic edible flowers and decorations make your dish look pretty. But the
ultimate goal is not a pretty dish. You cannot eat a pretty dish if it does not
taste good. Similarly the people you love don’t have to be visible to you all
the time, but they are always there to add taste to your life. Having said
this, I just feel and want to convey this thought that it would be nice if
things never got diluted in life. Even if it’s been a hundred times that you
have called your friend and he hasn’t called you, if you value the relationship,
pick up the phone and make a conversation. Every time that your loved one is
upset over something that you may think is not important, still shower them
with your love and attention, may be they are just missing the 'special feeling' and everything
would become better with a hug and a kiss.
Life has been bestowed upon us just
once and its worth making every moment of it special for your loved ones and
thus ultimately for yourself!
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